The How of Happiness: A New Approach to Getting the Life You Want

What an important and well-crafted book! Concerning its physical properties, the book I received nicely matched the images shown in the product listing. The print was crisp; the paper stock was of good, typical quality; the spine was sturdy. The writing style was just as I hoped it would be: practical, clear, concise, and unstintingly scientific, but not overly complex. Every chapter is evidence-based and actionable. Although research on happiness is constantly advancing, one unexpected way in which this book is valuable is that it gives the reader a framework for keeping pace with research developments. For example, instead of following science news about happiness in general, this book might inspire a reader to follow science news about current research findings on relationship quality and gratitude. Lyubomirsky has done humanity a great favor with this affordable, science-based, practical guide.

Sonja's dedication to the field of happiness shows in this work recommended to me by my therapist. Since reading the "9 Choices of Happiness: How We Choose to be Happy," awhile ago, I've wanted to know more about what I can do to ensure my own happiness. Sonja provides that with "The How of Happiness". I seem to have a low (and high) set point due to genetics. In other words, I have a mood disorder. I've sought for methods to smooth that out and have a more normal and even happy life. Sonja is dedicated to helping all people, not just those with mood disorders. I saw from her work, which I devoured in just a few days, that I could potentially achieve increasing levels of happiness beyond what I had ever had before. I transcribed her twelve areas of activity into Goalscape, a tool I use to set and achieve goals. Goalscape uses concentric circles to display goals and sub goals. Twelve areas fit around the circle like numbers on the face of a clock. At the center is my central goal, "A Happy You". I realized perhaps for the first time, that happiness was more dependent on what I did than a chemical from a bottle. Certainly good medication or supplements can be important, but there is only so much they can do. So much of happiness depends on what we do with our lives. Sonja gives suggestions that can guide goal setting and help me get (and stay) happy that much faster and inexpensively. She does not advocate a particular faith, but she explains the role of religion and spirituality in increasing happiness. She talks about how we become inured to good things around us and need to overcome that through gratitude and savouring joys. If we don't take time to slow down and be mindful, we can miss joys in our lives. Over the past year I've started practising meditation, and she explained how this practice can promote happiness, which gives me incentive to continue and make it more regular. I've also started a daily practice of Bible reading. She explains that many of her suggestions sound like common sense and have been around for millennia but have only recently been supported through scientific experiments. She herself is involved in happiness research which gives her voice that much more credibility. I have yet to experience the full benefit of her work because many of the practices she advocates work over a period of time. In our current world, it is sometimes difficult to be optimistic, but she fully explains the benefits of predicting a favourable outcome. I have decided to make happiness my number one value. Material things can bring short term benefits, but we quickly become inured to improvements in our circumstances. However, a change in our daily activities can produce a great and quick change in our level of happiness. Sonja explains how building relationships and social interaction can help promote happiness. Being a loner, I've struggled with this. A new romance started early this year has budded into a relationship that has the potential to be lasting. For the past year I've programmed an app that analyses daily activities from check lists. I have noticed that when I score and analyse my daily check lists, it promotes my happiness. I was not sure why. After reading Sonja's book, I discovered that many of the items on my check lists were activities she suggested from the scientific literature that promote happiness. When I do more of them in a day, a greater level of happiness is achieved. So I am dedicating myself to continue with my check lists, even on days I don't feel like doing them. For awhile this past year, actually several times, I let my check lists slide. Upon encouragement from a friend who has seen how much of a difference my check lists make, resuming them has almost instantly restored me to happiness and my former activity level. Committing to goals itself is one area Sonja mentions in her book. Sonja leaves it up to the reader to select specific activities and choose which areas of the twelve to work on. Some attention to each of the twelve areas is beneficial, but of course it works to prioritize what gets focused on first. Action is the key. With my check lists I can keep more things in scope and can work on most of the twelve areas simultaneously. I may sound too analytical about being happy, but I have discovered that happiness is best not merely left to chance. I want to consistently produce happy feelings and am willing to implement what science has discovered about the human potential for producing those feelings. You may wonder if I have become happy. I am discovering tools that help me produce happiness more consistently, more often, and more deeply. I am discovering tools that bring me back when I dip into depression. Have I fully beat depression? No. I would love to say that I have. I still have a mood disorder. But I am optimistic about my ability to deal with it. The fear of being overcome by it is much less. I think my optimism will increase as I continue to apply the principles I've learned in Sonja's book. More and more, I tell myself, "I am happy!" Thank you, Sonja, for your dedicated efforts to help as many people as you can.

Five stars for value. Four stars because there is so much room in the book for improvement. The pros: 1) Hooray that Sonja is putting a dent in one of the greatest insanities of our culture: The lack of intentional focus on happiness in education and science (a slight oversight for the last 2,000 years). 2) How wonderful that some money has actually been spent in research on life's most important quest. 3) It's great that we are coming to understand the value of happiness on all levels such that it is considered important to study and do research. 4) The scientific lens is a valuable lens to turn on just about any topic and this appears to be the most comprehensive effort in that direction so far for the general reader. 5) Lots of good ideas. 6) Some valuable counter-intuitive information. 7) It has already changed my life for the better. 8) It brought happiness to read. In short, how could anyone go wrong reading anything even slightly useful about increasing happiness? Read the book. The cons: Kindle cons: Questionnaires were hard to fill out on kindle. I'm building a website for myself and others to interactively and easily DO and record and even measure happiness consistent with many of the books features. The index lacks page numbers. Content cons: 1) As valuable as statistical research data is, it is incredibly blind to the complexity of the individual. You have NO information about how and why, on an individual level, the trend was set: Person a) got happier simply because they love attention and were getting more attention in some experiment. Person b) got happier because an experiment gave them some flow and focus, enabling them to feel productive and our culture teaches that we are more valuable if we are productive so they felt more valuable and this made them happy. c) got happier because the double-blind was thin and they picked up the researchers confidence that this approach would make them happier and decided to prove them right on some level. d) got happier overall but the writing part of the experiment was annoying while the thinking part was exhilarating. e) got happier because she had a crush on the researcher and WANTED to look happier for their next encounter so she would look better. I would consider the research twice as valuable if it was partnered with a personal explanation by each person in the experiment that could be dipped into online so that the subjective information could be gathered and matched more to the situation of the individual reader, who is not a statistic. This is where intuition trumps science in personal choices sometimes. And less scientific and subjective socially acceptable stories leave an incomplete picture, why not add in some data gathered through hypnosis to see how that diverges from the socially acceptable reasons people give (someone may not want to SAY that they were happier because they felt sexy around one researcher and wanted to look good, but it may have had far more bearing than the experiment). 2) You can learn so much reading about group results and suggestions but also continue one of the biggest trends in our unhappiness inherent in the culture: separation from our moment to moment experience and awareness in favor of external information about what we ought to be feeling and doing to be happy. 3) The author placed an enormous emphasis on how everything in the book was scientific at the beginning but in doing so discounted the 30% of anecdotal stories she shares about her own life, which in some cases is more informative than the science done so far. I may have missed it, but since double-blinds are considered so vital, it also was not clear in many cases if a double-blind was present in the experiments done in a classroom etc. If you are in a happiness course with a happiness expert trying to be happy that in itself is an environment predisposed to happiness. And so in some cases the lesson may be to spend more time in a happiness class experimenting rather than doing any one thing in particular. So much of what she finds HAS been common wisdom anecdotally for a long time. Which perhaps suggests that scientists need to learn to be less confident when dismissing things that cannot YET be be proved just because they don't have the measuring devices or budgets to explore the subjective terrain of consciousness with the same precision they can design a bridge. Given how vastly ignorant science remains in so many subjective areas it seems appropriate not only to invest a LOT more money in developing the science that can catch up to our internal nuances but also for scientists to be humble to the fact that there are many ways to know something without measuring it in a double-blind experiment that is very crude and still completely subjective when it comes to creating a story about WHY a certain cause had a certain result in a majority of people (but never everyone). Overall, I found the book a great use of my time. One thing not addressed in the book is the 20% of the population that is HSP, as defined by Elaine Arron. It turns out that 20% of every species thrives by taking a contrarian stance relative to the rest of the herd and has an uncommonly sensitive nervous system, making environmental control more important than it is for the other 80% of the population. This twenty percent of people may greatly distort data for the rest of the population in some experiements so it would be interesting to see how results differ when groups are first sorted into HSPs and non HSPs. As part of that 20% I find that my environment physically plays a role in my happiness much more than 10%. I also want to share, for those who do have more time and money, that it is quite possible to boost happiness 20-30% for years by constantly adjusting, improving and redesigning life and environment in small and fun ways specifically to increase happiness (I use my own subjective one to ten scale) through travel, many small home-improvements, joy-based shopping, hobbies (I've taken up radio control planes) etc. And finally, I think that happiness strategies may be cyclical. At one time my happiness, joy and pleasure came 90% from exploring romantic relationships. At another time it came 90% from inner growth and meditation. And now it is coming 90% from exploring and creating a beautiful life materially in hundreds of small ways. It's coming from living in the question: "What is the most exciting day I can imagine and how can I create that day NOW?" When I did not have any money that would have been a depressing question and meditation was exhilarating. Now that I do have the money to fly to Vegas for a Cirque du-Soleil show later in the evening that question wakes me up and engages me fully in flow - one of the states conducive to happiness. And I have no doubt that what brings my happiness will shift again within five years. All of this points to the blind-spots in research and the importance of understanding each of us as unique individuals who are not static, and do not respond statically to the same stimuli, but on a journey in which our values and what brings us happiness changes.

“All of us want to be happy, even if we don’t admit it openly or choose to cloak our desire in different words. Whether our dreams are about professional success, spiritual fulfillment, a sense of connection, a purpose in life, or love and sex, we covet those things because ultimately we believe that they will make us happier. Yet few of us truly appreciate just how much we can improve our happiness or know precisely how to go about doing it. To step back and consider your deep-seated assumptions about how to become a happier person and whether it’s even possible for you—what I hope this book will spur you to do—is to understand that becoming happier is realizable, that it’s in your power, and that it’s one of the most vital and momentous things that you can do for yourself and for those around you.” ~ Sonja Lyubomirsky from The How of Happiness People often ask me what ONE book I would recommend they read that I think best captures how to create an ideal life. I’ve never given an answer as nothing’s ever really met that standard. Now I can: The How of Happiness. This is the 87th Note I’ve worked on and it’s been fascinating to see the same Big Ideas repeated by philosophers, mystics and modern-day self-help gurus. It’s even more exciting, in fact, EXHILARATING (!!!), to see so many of these Ideas SCIENTIFICALLY TESTED and *PROVEN* to be effective. (Pardon the yelling. This book gets me a little excited. :) And that’s what this book is all about. As a research psychologist and University of California professor of psychology, for the last 18+ years Sonja Lyubomirsky has been testing various ways we can increase our level of happiness as she’s played a leading role in the nascent positive psychology movement that’s creating a science of optimal living. SUPER COOL stuff. I HIGHLY HIGHLY HIGHLY recommend you get the book. It’s packed with happiness assessments and scientifically proven strategies for boosting your level of happiness that I think you’ll really dig. Let’s explore some of the Big Ideas: 1. Why Be Happy? - Compelling reasons. 2. The 40% Solution - Focus here! 3. The Work of Happiness - It takes consistent effort. 4. 12 Happiness Activities - What’s your favorite? 5. Happiness Activity #1: - Expressing gratitude. So bust out your journal and imagine your ideal self as we move to embody the hows of happiness, will ya?!? :) More goodness— including PhilosophersNotes on 300+ books in our ​*OPTIMIZE*​ membership program. Find out more at brianjohnson . me.

I strongly recommend this book for anyone seeking to increase the amount of positive emotions and happiness in their lives. I am an avid reader of psychology and self-help books, with a background in counseling and science. I am planning to become a therapist, and recently became interested in the new field of positive psychology. While I had absorbed many useful insights from excellent books dealing with conquering negative emotions and depression, such as David Burns' "Feeling Good" and Harriet Braiker's "Getting Up When You're Feeling Down," I had always felt there must be more to psychology than that. The new field of positive psychology -- moving beyond dealing with negative emotions into building one's positive emotions and strengths -- has been very exciting to me. Professor Lyubomirsky's book is one of the best books in the field that I have read so far. She synthesizes the results of dozens of scientific studies to create useful, practical, simple, common sense tactics for people to use who want more happiness and general positive emotions in their lives, and who also want to build up their positive strengths. A reader does not have to have a science background or a counseling background to implement the strategies she extracts from scientific research done on happiness. I am now on my third re-reading of her book. It is written in a clear, easy-to-read style, but it is soundly based on complex scientific studies.

I've been on a journey myself, and in hindsight I seem to have figured out many of the ways to become happier myself, but also to be able to spread happiness to others. About three years ago, I decided to market myself more, so I started to appreciate what I'm good at, but I also began giving positive feedback to friends and coworkers, in public! This road led to many positive experiences that I wished to spread to others. I got increasingly interested in positive psychology, but much of the best material was hard to understand, then I found this book, it's so to the point, and if I want to know more, I follow the reference. Really appreciate how easy it is to understand, the good examples and how she guides me on finding the best approach for me. I recommend this book to everyone that... No, not any particular type of person: I recommend this book to Everyone! Read it and you will become a happier person.

I have read almost every non-technical book written on the psychology of happiness and positive psychology. While they are all good, The How of Happiness is by far the best. This is no generic self-help book with off-the-cuff suggestions stemming from the authors' own life or anecdotal evidence. Every single claim Dr. Lyubomirsky makes is backed by scientific evidence. Moreover, the book's content is supported by peer-reviewed journal articles. While I am an economist, and not a psychologist, I do know which journals are the most prestigious, and the bulk of this book is based on publications from the most prestigious psychological journals. To illustrate how highly I recommend this book, consider this. I personally spent over $100 buying multiple copies of the book and giving them to several of my students, in hopes they will read it. If they do read it, they are certain to live happier lives. I am naturally a very happy person, and can say without reservation that this book has made me happier. My friends have found it surprising that someone as happy as me would be reading a book on happiness. After hearing my profound respect for this book, they too purchased it and found it a life-changing experience. Of the many reasons we do science, one is to improve the lot of humans, to become a happier society. We are fortunate to live in an age when science has uncovered the science of happiness, and fortunate to have Dr. Lyubomirsky to communicate this science to a non-technical audience so clearly. In my opinion, this book is the pinnacle of science.

As so often the case, the author doesn’t realize she is talk TOO MUCH. everything in this the book is worth noting, it’s well conveyed, makes sense, and steers you in the right direction. There is a noble attempt to align your particularities to a cluster of happiness enhancing techniques so as to not set you off in a direction you’ll likely not suit. But in my opinion this tracking stumbles and you’re left not really seeing any strong reason to favor one method (gratitude) over another (health enhancing activities). Only my bias perhaps but anyone from the upper level university world seems to be unable to contain their speech. A 100 page version of this book would have made it far more poignant. It goes, rather into every little detail with caveats and reservations for everything, without really any strong quantitative info on efficacy of the supposed real scientific basis for all this advice that I for one just found myself plowing ahead and seeking to reach the last page. Would be great to think someone could help steer you to being more lastingly happy despite circumstance but I found this book to be very thin soup in the end. Was OK but not as good as the hyped reviews suggested.

O que mais gostei desse livro é que é pesadamente baseado em pesquisas científicas, contendo todas as referências bibliográficas no final do livro. Diferente de muitos livros estilo "coach". Não é necessariamente um livro super "divertido" de ler, mas é muito valioso. Recomendo fortemente.

Je suis ravie avec cet achat. Merci beaucoup. Je vous souhaite de bonnes fêtes ! Que du plus +++++ ++++

I am a voracious reader of self help or behavioural books, not because I have too many problems, but because I am in love with human mind and want to get a better insight about it. This is probably the most scientific book on happiness, a welcome break from hundred other books on the topic that follow the stereotype plot of some guy renouncing the corporate world and joining a yoga/meditation retreat. Nothing wrong with those retreats, but I feel you don;t need to be a monk to achieve happiness in life. And, this book cements that belief, by sharing well researched wisdom and lots of meaningful exercises. The only thing that did not go well with me is the claim that 50% of our happiness is decided by our genes. I feel it is much lower. A must read by all means!

Muy bueno

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